How Can I Get Over A Breakup? "We'd been dating for six months and had been friends for five years. When he wanted to end the relationship, he couldn't even face me. He just stopped talking to me. I felt helpless. The disappointment was overwhelming. I kept asking myself, ' what did i do wrong?' - Rachel. A Breakup can crush your joyful disposition and replace it with tearful despair. Consider Jeff and Susan, who dated for two years. Jeff sent Susan text messages with expression of endearment. From time to time, he gave her gifts to show that he was thinking of her.
"Jeff put forth an effort to listen to me and understand me." Susan says"He made me feel special."
Before long, Jeff and Susan were talking about marriage and where they would live as husband and wife, Jeff even inquired about Susan's ring size. Then quite suddenly, he called of the relationship! Susan was devastated. She went through the motions of daily life, but she felt numb with shock. "I became mentally and physically exhausted." she says.
Why It Hurts?
If you've been in a situation similar to that of Susan, you might well wonder. 'Will i even be able to move on?'. Breaking up may be one of the most traumatic experiences you've ever had to endure. Infact, some have said that a breakup is like a minideath. You may even fing yourself going through these and perhaps typycal stages of grief: Denial. 'it can't be over. He'll change his mind in a day or two.' Anger. 'How could he do this to me? I can't stand him! Depression. 'i'm unlovable. No one will ever love me.' Acceptance. 'I'm going to be alk right. The breakup hurt, but i'm getting better.' The good news is, you can reach the acceptance stage. How much time it will take to get there depends on a number of factors, including how long your relationship lasted and how far it progressed. In the meantime, how can you cope with your heartbreak?Moving Forward
You may have heard the saying, Time heals all wounds. When yo first break up, those words might ring hollow. That's because time is only part of the solution. A cut on your skin will heal in time, but it hurts now. You need to stop the bleeding and soothe the pain. You also need to keep it from becoming infected. The same is true with an emotional wound. Right now, it hurts. But there are step you can take to lessen the pain and keep from becoming infected with bitterness. Time will do its part, but how can you do yours? Try the following. Allow yourself to grieve. There's nothing wrong with having a good cry. After all, the Bible says there is a time to weep and even a time to wail. Shedding tears doesn't mean you're weak. In the midst of emotional anguish, even David-a courageous warrior-once admitted; "I am weary with groaning; all the night make i my bed to swim. I water my couch with tears." -Psalm 6:6.Take care of your physical health. Physical exercise and proper nutrition will help replenish the energy lost from the emotional toll of a breakup.
Keep busy. Don't stop doing the things that interest you. And now, more than ever, don't isolate yourself. Associating with those who care about you will give you something positive on which to focus.
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